You're Beautiful

I sat down to write about how beautiful my God is. But my heart is too full for words. All I want to do is worship this amazing God. All I want to do is give Him every part of me. I can't even begin to describe all He's done for me. He quite literally turned my life around and took it in a direction I never would've imagined for myself. He's been so much more than enough. And even though I've just succeeded in writing a paragraph about how amazing He is, my words right now don't seem nearly enough for how much He's done for me.

So, I kinda want to know: What are some of your amazing God stories from the past year? How has He changed you? How has He saved you? What has He done for you, and what has He led you to do for Him? At this time of year, when we tend to take for granted that He came as a baby to live a perfect life and die for us, what is it that brings you to your knees in amazement?

And yeah, I really truly want to know. So leave a comment on this post, or on the Facebook link, or send me a message, because I want to be astounded by how He's working in your life. So then we can worship Him together.

I love each and every one of you, and I pray that you are learning to discover the glorious riches of the love of Jesus Christ.

Merry Christmas.

Ordained Praise

Satan loves pity parties. You may think you're the guest of honor, but it's really him. He thinks they're the greatest things ever. Pity parties are the perfect time to sneak up behind you and whisper in your ear every single little insecurity you've ever had. They're the perfect time to distract you from everything you know is true. And what he really loves about them is that they make you feel helpless against it. You don't see a way out of this self-pity and all the hurtful thoughts it brings; so he convinces you that it's not even worth trying. Or if it is worth trying, he warps what you believe about how to fight against it. Pretty soon, we have eating disorders; cutting; depression; suicide. Most commonly, we hate ourselves for feeling this way -- and thus begins the vicious cycle of self-pity.

And oh, Satan just gives a gurgling giggle of glee. The absolute best lies come out during these times. One of the main ones: This isn't a pity party. I'm hurting, and I want to mope about it, okay?? Yes. We hurt. And Satan loves to convince us that it's absolutely okay to dwell on that pain. And that even if it's not okay, there's really nothing we can do about it. After all, if we're not thinking about it, how are we ever going to get better?

LIES, I tell you, lies! Absolutely, we should not deny that we're hurting. (That's another one of the things he likes to convince us to do... Golly, I don't like him.) But do you know what we are supposed to do with all that pain? With all those broken pieces?

"Cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you." ~1 Peter 5:7
"Arise, cry out in the watches of the night, as the watches of the night begin; pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord." ~Lamentations 2:19
"From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger." ~Psalm 8:2

The first two state exactly what we should do when confronted with pain: Dump it. Not on your friends, although of course you can ask for prayer. But they cannot heal you. So please don't expect them to. No, cast everything on God. For He cares for you. He knows everything that's going on already, but there's something crucial about you actually coming to Him and talking about it.

And finally, my personal favorite response when Satan's lies start to creep in: Worship. Praise. This should not be that kind of worship like, "Oh my gosh, God, life is really horrible. Please make it better." That's supplication. That's the kind of intercession that your friends can be doing for you. That's also included in the "casting your cares" part. But once those cares are cast, leave them, and just start worshiping. Praise Him for who He is. Praise Him for His promises. Completely disregard your circumstances, and just worship! He is worthy, and whatever is going on in your life does not change that fact. Satan cannot stand it when you worship God -- especially in the face of pain.

These are a few "worship methods" that my mom and I have come up with and shared over the years. Of course, they're not original, but they are effective, and we go back to them over and over again.

• Journal. Satan cannot hear your thoughts; and if you try to pray in your head, you're much more likely to get distracted by those lies still being shouted at you from that despicable, mean, horrid...you know.
• Pray out loud. Same dealio as the journaling. And specifically, pray that God would banish the Evil One!
  
• Read scripture out loud. Particularly Psalms. Psalms of thanksgiving are the absolute best.
• Sing! This is my favorite (for those of you who know me, that's not a surprise...) I sit at the piano or pull out the guitar and just repeat the same worship songs over and over. OR I pull out my iPod (or open YouTube) and sing along. These songs usually have nothing to do with the precise lies I'm hearing at the moment. They're just songs telling God how absolutely great He is. And Satan really doesn't like being reminded of that...

Both leaving the already-cast cares behind and worshiping take willpower. Even though it's counter-intuitive, we sometimes want (subconsciously) to stay wrapped up in our self-pity and our pain. We want to feel it as much as possible. We want to use it as a cry to be noticed. We want a problem that's too big for God to fix.

Well -- there isn't one. So no matter how much you don't want to, get with your King and praise Him. Even if it doesn't feel real, even if it doesn't feel true, He'll help you. As you pour out your worship before Him, He will fill you up with Him. And Satan will run away as fast as possible from the powerful presence of God.

It's sometimes not easy -- but it's simple. So worship, my friend. Be astounded by the beauty of your God. And forget all of that pain you hold inside; for as you praise Him, He heals you. And when He heals you, you won't be able to keep from praising Him.

Dear You

So, I've gotten several responses regarding the fact that I write my future husband letters. And I've had at least six people ask me how in the world you start. So, although this is not the "first letter" I've written to my husband, it is a "first letter" that somehow didn't make it into my happy notebook of wonder and love. This one is not going to my husband, so I thought I'd post it here for all of you to see an example. Obviously this is not the only way it can be done, so don't feel inclined to copy me!!

Dear You,

So, hi. I'm your wife. Nice to meet you.

I'm quite in love with you. Do you know that? Let me tell you a bit about what you are. You're head-over-heels in love with Jesus Christ. You care for other people more than you care for yourself. You're going to be a great daddy. You respect me. You like my family. My family likes you. You're my very bestest friend, next to Jesus. And I have a whole list of things you are down in a box in my room. I take it out every once in a while and remind myself that you are a person very worth waiting for.

So who are you? Do I know your name already? Are you on the other side of the world, or are you right across town? Have we walked the same halls, or have our feet never touched the same ground?

I don't know. But I will one day. I am so very excited for that day.

Now let me tell you a bit about who I am right now.

I'm seventeen years old. I'm crazy in love with Jesus Christ. You see, the thing is, I'm in love with you, but you're not the center of my life. As wonderful as you are, I know you'll mess up. I'm quite aware of that. So I have decided not to make you the foundation of my happiness. My eternal, perfect Prince is the one who determines my happiness. I hope that takes lots and lots of pressure off of you. And I hope it also leads you to find total fulfillment in Christ, so that you can take the pressure off of me -- believe me, I know I will mess up!

I've made a commitment to you, and to God. I've promised my Creator and the Author of our love story that this story will only exist if it will bring Him more glory -- if we can work for His Kingdom better hand-in-hand than on our own. And I've promised you that I'm waiting, no matter how long, no matter how hard, until Jesus gives you my entire heart. These promises have not always been easy to keep. But thanks to a God who makes all things new, He's taken my mistakes and made them into some of my most beautiful lessons. And through it all, He's held my heart.

And that's really what this letter is all about -- the God who's held my heart. He's the One who's brought us this far, and He's the only One who will be able to keep us together and continue to script a beautiful love story long after "I do." He's the only One who makes it possible for me to offer you the untainted gift of my heart, despite all my mistakes. He's the only One -- well, He's just the only One, isn't He?

So tonight, I pray that you're learning to surrender your heart completely to the God who loves you better than I do. I pray for your safety, I pray for your family, I pray for everything about you, that it would all be lost and swallowed up in the magnificent heart of Jesus Christ.

Waiting,
~Kendall

A Dance With Jesus

Last night was my high school's Homecoming dance. It was an emotionally exhausting evening in many ways; but I loved it. And I'm about to tell you one of the reasons.

I don't usually worry about whether or not I'm asked to dance. I dance some, I sit others out, others I dance with my friends, but it typically all averages out nicely. However, at one point last night, I was aching for a dance. So I sat down and danced with Jesus.

Sound like an oxymoron? So is Jesus' love. I sat on a bench, accepted Jesus' gentle invitation to take His hand, and waltzed through the other couples -- all while never leaving my seat. As my eyes rested on the people on the dance floor -- some I know well and love, others I've only just met -- I talked to Jesus about them. I prayed for them as individuals; for them in relation to me, in relation to the person they were dancing with, and in relation to Jesus. For some, I prayed renewed passion. I prayed peace over others. I prayed truth over the lies being spoken to some. There were those I simply praised Him for. Others, I just said, "Jesus, I have no idea what to pray for that person or even what their name is, but please work in them!"

I cried quite a few times last night for various reasons. Most of the time, people assumed there was something wrong. And most of the time, there was. I was selfishly crying for myself. But there was one point during the night when my tears were justified; and that was during my dance with Jesus. I wept for others. He stepped in and broke my heart for the things that break His. He stepped in and reminded me, "This is not about you. This is about Me. I'm holding your heart; now pray for those who haven't yet learned to give Me the pieces." And then He gently added, "And never forget that I love dancing with you, because you are so, so precious to Me."

So this is to tell all of you beautiful girls (and handsome guys) that when there's no one to dance with, Jesus steps out and says, "I want your entire life to be a dance with Me; but let's just start with this song." Your dance with Jesus may look entirely different from mine. Maybe He'll take that entire time to remind you how absolutely beautiful you are. Maybe there will be one specific person you need to talk about while dancing. Maybe it's time to close your eyes, and trust Him to lead you. Whatever it is, He'll wait there with outstretched hands.

And so the phrase, "Dance with God; He'll let the perfect man cut in" can come true; very, very literally. =)

Battle Cry

I really love spiritual warfare.

Now, that comment can easily be misunderstood. I do not sit around dwelling on this topic. I do not love the fact that Satan has power on the earth. I do not sit around calling up demons so that I can fight them.

I love fighting. With every word I say and everything I do, I fight for the Kingdom of God. Not by dwelling on the reality of Satan or his minions; but by dwelling on the beauty and power of Christ. That, in and of itself, is spiritual warfare. Every time I open my mouth to praise Him, every time you open your mouth to praise Him, Satan is silenced. Psalm 8:2 says, "From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger." Because I want to live my life to be a worshiper, my entire life is a battle cry.

So what exactly does a battle-cry-life look like? The first part is what I mentioned above: A life of worship is the life of a warrior. Spiritual warfare does not cease when we step outside our church doors. We cannot leave our heart of worship in the sanctuary. We are told to live as though working for God, not for man. Doing everything with a heart unto the Lord, keeping our eyes and mind focused on Him, is one of the best ways that we can combat our enemy.

The second part of living this life is recognizing Satan's lies in your life (putting on the belt of truth). In Hosea, God proclaimed, "My people perish from lack of knowledge." The lies that are breathed into our lives must constantly be replaced by God's truth. This requires being continually in the Word of God, understanding who He is and what He says -- and then believing that He is who He says He is, and will do what He says He will do (shield of faith).

We are also told not to give the devil a foothold by embracing things such as anger, bitterness, revenge, etc (putting on the breastplate of righteousness). A heart fully surrendered to Christ and striving to be more like His will, of course, be under more attack, because it is more of a threat -- but it will be helped.

We are also commanded to have our feet fitted with the gospel of peace, and to take up the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit. One of the most effective ways to combat Satan's army is to spread the Word of God. To be His missionaries, both in our hometown and around the world. Revelation 12:11 says, "They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony." Our testimony, and our identity in Christ, are a battle cry and a weapon all in one. Use them.

Finally, Ephesians 6 tells us to "pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests." Satan cannot stand a vibrant prayer life. Don't just pray in your head -- remember, Satan can't hear your thoughts! I write my prayers. You can speak them out loud. Pray scripture. Whatever you do, just pray.

And always remember that "you, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world" (1 John4:4). Our victory is already secured. Do not dwell on these things, but also do not be afraid of them. Proclaim the word of God boldly. Live a life of worship. Recall that you are a citizen of heaven, sealed in Christ. And fight.

"Therefore rejoice, you heavens and you who dwell in them! But woe to the earth and the sea, because the devil has gone down to you! He is filled with fury, because he knows that his time is short." ~Revelation 12:12